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When It Comes to Halloween, I'm on the Supply Side of the Economy Oct. 11, 2025
I'm told that ours is a market economy — driven by supply and demand, or end-stage capitalism ... Read More
Halloween Costumes That Will Offend No One Oct. 11, 2025
It used to be that Halloween offered a release valve on the year's serious discourse, a chance to in... Read More
Toddlin' in Chicago: Government Overreach, Circa 1972 Oct. 10, 2025
Chicago, I'd heard, was a toddlin' town. In fact, I'd heard it repeatedly from a woman in the seat b... Read More
What Would Erma Bombeck Do? Oct. 04, 2025
There's a quote going around from Erma Bombeck, the late, legendary essayist: "When humor goes, ther... Read More
Artificial Intelligence Meets Natural Stupidity Oct. 03, 2025
We keep hearing that Artificial Intelligence may one day decide to improve the planet by getting rid... Read More
New Slogans for Tylenol Sep. 27, 2025
The folks behind Tylenol have a rebranding conundrum. Overcoming the lasting harm of recent politica... Read More
Laughter for Fun and Profit Sep. 26, 2025
A young entrepreneur is meeting with the executive team of his top corporate client in the office of... Read More
The Tyranny of the Lawnmower Sep. 20, 2025
Chores I will gladly outsource to qualified professionals: oil changes, mammograms, colonoscopies, h... Read More
Mr. Marvelous Is Not His Real Name Sep. 19, 2025
As a professional speaker, I meet a lot of self-help gurus, some of whom are only too happy to work ... Read More
Quiz: Should You Give That Baseball to a Child? Sep. 13, 2025
Another sweaty, storied baseball season is sliding into home, but there's still time to steal a souv... Read More
A Novel Idea Sep. 12, 2025
At 7 a.m. that day, my short-term goal and long-term plan were identical: I wanted to survive the ne... Read More
Cracker Barrel Is a Distraction From a Darker American Rebrand Sep. 06, 2025
On a rainy Monday, I slid into a seat at Cracker Barrel. The chain's new, doomed logo dotted flatwar... Read More
Have You Heard of This New Invention Called Cash? Aug. 30, 2025
Trying to keep up with the pace of innovation these days feels fruitless. Recent concerns range from... Read More
The Adventures of Cuddly Face Aug. 29, 2025
I'd agreed to host a table at the company's awards banquet the evening after I did the opening keyno... Read More
A Short Person Ponders the Leg-Lengthening Industry Aug. 23, 2025
When I was 16 and applying for my driver's license, I had to provide my height. No one was behind me... Read More
Start-ups and Stupid Stuff Aug. 22, 2025
"I'm going to make you a billionaire," Benito Mussolini said. That would certainly come in handy. He... Read More
Are These Lawmakers or Teens Who Love Fart Jokes? Aug. 16, 2025
Hey, this is just a quick reminder about how dumb things have gotten. In what way? Well, take your p... Read More
Don't Bank on It Aug. 15, 2025
Remember the olden days when banks were friendly? When they gave you a toaster to open an account an... Read More
An Exclusive Interview With Louis Pasteur Aug. 09, 2025
Thank you so much for sitting down with me today, famed French microbiologist Louis Pasteur. Oui.... Read More
Easy Trader Joe's Recipes for Your News Cycle Anxiety Aug. 02, 2025
It's another bustling week in these United States. I've taken the liberty of rounding up quick, easy... Read More
